1
00:00:02,052 --> 00:00:03,619
- no one wants
to publish your book.
2
00:00:03,637 --> 00:00:05,054
- this is a big fuckin' bummer.
3
00:00:05,089 --> 00:00:07,456
I could really use an influx
of "cashish" right about now.
4
00:00:07,475 --> 00:00:09,826
- runkle,
quit beating your meat.
5
00:00:09,860 --> 00:00:12,061
- hank moody, sue collini.
6
00:00:12,096 --> 00:00:13,813
- becca's dad, right?
- yikes.
7
00:00:13,848 --> 00:00:14,848
- chelsea's mom?
8
00:00:14,899 --> 00:00:16,683
- hey, speak of the she-devils.
9
00:00:16,734 --> 00:00:18,184
- can i go over to chelsea's?
10
00:00:18,235 --> 00:00:20,320
- actually, stay for dinner.
hank moody...
11
00:00:20,354 --> 00:00:22,856
I'd like to introduce you
to richard bates, the writer.
12
00:00:22,907 --> 00:00:24,691
He's going to be
teaching here this year.
13
00:00:24,742 --> 00:00:26,309
- big fan.
drink with me.
14
00:00:26,327 --> 00:00:27,977
- ten years' sobriety
down the drain.
15
00:00:27,995 --> 00:00:29,579
- fuck me.
- i can't afford
16
00:00:29,613 --> 00:00:30,864
To keep paying rent
and mortgage
17
00:00:30,915 --> 00:00:32,448
At the same time, okay?
18
00:00:32,482 --> 00:00:34,334
I'll just--i'll move back in.
- this can't be right.
19
00:00:34,368 --> 00:00:35,335
- it's within his right.
20
00:00:35,369 --> 00:00:36,536
- oh! yes!
21
00:00:36,587 --> 00:00:38,588
- you're the dean
of this fine institute
22
00:00:38,622 --> 00:00:40,156
Of fancy book learning?
- correct.
23
00:00:40,174 --> 00:00:43,593
- who wants to see me talk
and do the pee-pee dance?
24
00:00:43,627 --> 00:00:44,594
[laughter]
25
00:00:44,628 --> 00:00:46,763
- let's get your clothes.
26
00:00:46,797 --> 00:00:48,181
- what about bates?
27
00:00:48,215 --> 00:00:49,516
Is he gonna be able
to do his thing?
28
00:00:49,550 --> 00:00:52,168
- from rehab?
i doubt it.
29
00:00:52,186 --> 00:00:53,836
You wouldn't happen to know
30
00:00:53,854 --> 00:00:56,339
Of any other
bad boy novelists
31
00:00:56,357 --> 00:00:59,025
Looking for a teaching gig,
would you?
32
00:00:59,059 --> 00:01:02,028
[rock music]
33
00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:04,013
? ?
34
00:01:08,485 --> 00:01:11,704
- [whistles]
35
00:01:13,707 --> 00:01:16,125
[muttering gibberish]
36
00:01:16,160 --> 00:01:18,461
- mm!
37
00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:20,029
- yes, marcy.
38
00:01:20,047 --> 00:01:21,998
- how are things at work,
teach?
39
00:01:22,032 --> 00:01:24,467
- excellent question,
cougar smurf.
40
00:01:24,501 --> 00:01:26,753
Aside from the fact that
i generally loathe young people,
41
00:01:26,804 --> 00:01:28,304
It's a pretty cush gig.
42
00:01:28,339 --> 00:01:30,757
- and we're keeping our hands
off the young nubiles, are we?
43
00:01:30,808 --> 00:01:31,841
- please.
44
00:01:31,875 --> 00:01:33,259
Teenage girls
are greatly overrated.
45
00:01:33,310 --> 00:01:35,711
Present company excepted,
of course.
46
00:01:35,729 --> 00:01:40,266
- of course.
47
00:01:40,317 --> 00:01:41,484
- are you okay over there?
48
00:01:41,518 --> 00:01:43,269
Are you stroking out
or something?
49
00:01:43,320 --> 00:01:44,487
- oh, whatever do you mean?
50
00:01:44,521 --> 00:01:46,189
- you're grinning
like a mongoloid.
51
00:01:46,223 --> 00:01:48,107
- no, i think
i'm just feeling grateful.
52
00:01:48,158 --> 00:01:49,558
This seems like old times,
don't it?
53
00:01:49,577 --> 00:01:51,327
- here we go.
54
00:01:51,362 --> 00:01:52,612
- truth be told,
55
00:01:52,663 --> 00:01:54,447
I remember the food
being a hell of a lot better.
56
00:01:54,498 --> 00:01:55,448
What about this steak?
57
00:01:55,499 --> 00:01:57,000
Tastes like prison ass.
58
00:01:57,034 --> 00:01:58,668
- becca. miss.
59
00:01:58,702 --> 00:02:01,588
You're not eating.
what's wrong with you?
60
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:03,506
- nothing. i'm on a diet.
61
00:02:03,540 --> 00:02:04,757
- what?
62
00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:06,843
- hey, you are a beautiful,
young, white woman.
63
00:02:06,877 --> 00:02:08,261
Remember that.
64
00:02:08,295 --> 00:02:09,578
- you do not need
to be on a diet.
65
00:02:09,597 --> 00:02:11,047
- dad, i could easily
lose ten pounds.
66
00:02:11,081 --> 00:02:12,382
- [gasps]
your mother would kill me
67
00:02:12,416 --> 00:02:13,766
If you develop
an eating disorder.
68
00:02:13,801 --> 00:02:16,085
- i like me a big girl.
69
00:02:16,103 --> 00:02:17,353
Yeah, before marcy here,
70
00:02:17,388 --> 00:02:19,422
Most of my girlfriends
were somewhat zaftig.
71
00:02:19,440 --> 00:02:20,556
- yeah, i remember that.
72
00:02:20,590 --> 00:02:22,058
Your apartment was like
half off at lane bryant.
73
00:02:22,092 --> 00:02:23,443
- that's right,
that's right.
74
00:02:23,477 --> 00:02:25,895
Big and getable.
that's the way i liked 'em.
75
00:02:25,929 --> 00:02:27,930
And then old half-pint here
came along and...
76
00:02:27,948 --> 00:02:30,867
- oh, god. please cut
the sweet talk, will you?
77
00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,268
- [kisses]
- we're not together.
78
00:02:32,286 --> 00:02:34,287
We're living together.
there is a huge difference.
79
00:02:34,321 --> 00:02:36,772
- hey, hey. i've made
my intentions known.
80
00:02:36,790 --> 00:02:38,774
Love will find a way.
81
00:02:38,792 --> 00:02:40,209
[doorbell rings]
82
00:02:40,244 --> 00:02:41,961
No, no, no, no.
sit.
83
00:02:41,996 --> 00:02:44,047
Sit, relax, eat, enjoy.
84
00:02:44,081 --> 00:02:46,416
Mwah. i will get it.
85
00:02:50,671 --> 00:02:52,472
I'm sorry, my nubian brother.
86
00:02:52,506 --> 00:02:54,223
We're right in the middle
of dinner.
87
00:02:54,258 --> 00:02:55,842
We're not interested
this evening. ta.
88
00:02:55,893 --> 00:02:57,176
- not interested in what,
exactly?
89
00:02:57,227 --> 00:02:59,062
- whatever it is
you're selling, brother.
90
00:02:59,096 --> 00:03:01,597
Let me guess.
magazine subscriptions?
91
00:03:01,631 --> 00:03:02,631
- i'm here for marcy.
92
00:03:02,650 --> 00:03:05,518
- marcy? my wife?
93
00:03:05,569 --> 00:03:09,355
- i'm here to pick up marcy.
for our date.
94
00:03:09,406 --> 00:03:10,356
- hi.
95
00:03:10,407 --> 00:03:13,826
Thank you.
96
00:03:13,861 --> 00:03:18,081
- see you around,
my nubian brother.
97
00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:23,336
[upbeat music]
98
00:03:23,370 --> 00:03:31,344
? ?
99
00:04:10,334 --> 00:04:12,034
- "the shy, talented vampire
100
00:04:12,052 --> 00:04:14,804
"looked up to his
centuries-old mentor.
101
00:04:14,838 --> 00:04:16,973
"even in the twilight
of his eternal youth,
102
00:04:17,007 --> 00:04:19,592
"the old man was wicked-smart
and roguishly handsome,
103
00:04:19,643 --> 00:04:23,563
"a glint of the devil flickering
in his beautiful, undead eyes.
104
00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:25,398
"the young vampire knew
there was much to be learned
105
00:04:25,432 --> 00:04:27,517
"from his blood-sucking mentor--
106
00:04:27,551 --> 00:04:31,487
"how to live, how to feed,
how to fuck.
107
00:04:31,522 --> 00:04:33,406
"but the boy was hungry.
108
00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:35,274
"ravenous, actually.
109
00:04:35,325 --> 00:04:36,859
"soon he would have to feed,
110
00:04:36,893 --> 00:04:38,861
"and feed he would.
111
00:04:38,895 --> 00:04:41,664
"the moronic frat boys that
mocked him on a daily basis
112
00:04:41,698 --> 00:04:43,533
Were good for something
at least."
113
00:04:47,087 --> 00:04:49,372
- [clears throat]
114
00:04:49,406 --> 00:04:52,175
[coughs]
115
00:04:52,209 --> 00:04:55,578
- i--i'm just texting
with my daughter.
116
00:04:55,596 --> 00:04:58,131
It's the only time she actually
acknowledges my existence.
117
00:04:58,182 --> 00:05:00,916
Okay, so what about
balt's story?
118
00:05:00,934 --> 00:05:03,102
I heard something about
vampires and frat boys and cum,
119
00:05:03,137 --> 00:05:04,303
So i'm half-chubbed.
120
00:05:04,354 --> 00:05:07,940
How about the rest
of you spoiled, rich kids?
121
00:05:07,975 --> 00:05:09,942
Someone?
122
00:05:09,977 --> 00:05:12,028
Anyone?
123
00:05:12,062 --> 00:05:16,065
Bueller? bueller?
124
00:05:16,099 --> 00:05:20,736
Bueller.
what say ye, jackie?
125
00:05:20,770 --> 00:05:21,871
- he's my roommate.
126
00:05:21,905 --> 00:05:23,623
He'll get mad at me.
127
00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,291
- maybe, but ultimately
he'll thank you
128
00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:28,327
For having the balls
to say something of substance.
129
00:05:28,378 --> 00:05:29,412
- okay.
130
00:05:29,446 --> 00:05:32,215
Well, i've told him
a thousand times
131
00:05:32,249 --> 00:05:34,133
He needs to drop
the vampire bullshit.
132
00:05:34,168 --> 00:05:35,635
It's stupid.
133
00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:37,720
You're not a fucking
creature of the night, balt.
134
00:05:37,754 --> 00:05:38,721
- says you, slut.
135
00:05:38,755 --> 00:05:39,955
- see?
what'd i tell you?
136
00:05:39,973 --> 00:05:41,224
- anything else?
137
00:05:41,258 --> 00:05:45,144
- well, uh, there was an
awful lot of talk about fucking,
138
00:05:45,179 --> 00:05:46,462
But no actual sex.
139
00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:47,730
That kind of bummed me out.
140
00:05:47,764 --> 00:05:49,932
- well, it is possible
that longing for something
141
00:05:49,966 --> 00:05:51,651
Is better than
actually having it.
142
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,319
I've heard it said
that satisfaction
143
00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:55,271
Is the death of desire.
144
00:05:55,305 --> 00:05:57,190
- interesting.
do you need a tampon?
145
00:05:57,241 --> 00:05:59,242
I think i have an extra
in my purse.
146
00:05:59,276 --> 00:06:01,477
- ow. whoa.
look at the time already.
147
00:06:01,495 --> 00:06:02,645
Wow.
148
00:06:02,663 --> 00:06:04,113
- actually,
there's 15 minutes left.
149
00:06:04,147 --> 00:06:07,500
- which is why
i will leave you with this.
150
00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:09,318
I can't teach you how to write,
151
00:06:09,336 --> 00:06:11,871
And anybody who says they can
is full of shit.
152
00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:13,840
The only thing i can do
153
00:06:13,874 --> 00:06:15,374
Is write about the shit
that excites me,
154
00:06:15,425 --> 00:06:16,542
The shit that gets me hard.
155
00:06:16,593 --> 00:06:19,212
So, balt, if you want
to write about vampires
156
00:06:19,263 --> 00:06:21,214
Drinking each other's blood
and cum and whatnot,
157
00:06:21,265 --> 00:06:22,632
By all means, go for it.
158
00:06:22,666 --> 00:06:23,799
Write the shit out of it.
159
00:06:23,833 --> 00:06:25,601
Don't be niggardly
with your emotions.
160
00:06:25,636 --> 00:06:28,771
Just run it up the flagpole
and see who salutes, okay?
161
00:06:28,805 --> 00:06:30,857
Now get the fuck out of here.
162
00:06:30,891 --> 00:06:31,941
Go read a book or something.
163
00:06:31,975 --> 00:06:33,676
Preferably one of mine.
164
00:06:38,282 --> 00:06:39,899
- you know, i try not
to think about it too much,
165
00:06:39,950 --> 00:06:42,702
But i could have been t.a.-ing
for richard bates right now,
166
00:06:42,736 --> 00:06:44,987
And that would have been
a real education for me.
167
00:06:45,021 --> 00:06:47,707
I was doing my thesis on him.
168
00:06:47,741 --> 00:06:50,576
Yeah, and then you had to go
and knock him off the wagon.
169
00:06:50,627 --> 00:06:51,994
- but look how
it worked out for you.
170
00:06:52,028 --> 00:06:55,197
You get to learn at the feet
of a master...bator.
171
00:06:55,215 --> 00:06:57,216
- oh, ho. clearly.
172
00:06:57,251 --> 00:06:59,201
Oh, hi, felicia.
173
00:06:59,219 --> 00:07:00,887
- hi.
174
00:07:00,921 --> 00:07:02,004
How's it going, professor?
175
00:07:02,038 --> 00:07:05,591
- in a word? awesome.
176
00:07:05,642 --> 00:07:07,042
- ooh.
177
00:07:07,060 --> 00:07:08,678
Interesting curriculum.
178
00:07:08,712 --> 00:07:11,230
- ah, look at that.
i sound like a fuckin' retard.
179
00:07:11,265 --> 00:07:13,215
- no. don't be so hard
on yourself.
180
00:07:13,233 --> 00:07:14,684
But you might want to erase it
181
00:07:14,718 --> 00:07:16,719
Before word spreads
through these hallowed halls.
182
00:07:16,737 --> 00:07:18,571
Academics can be vicious.
183
00:07:18,605 --> 00:07:20,773
- at least i'm not
tucking my dong in class.
184
00:07:20,824 --> 00:07:22,742
Not with my pants off, anyway.
185
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:25,278
- have you taken the sexual
harassment seminar, yet?
186
00:07:25,329 --> 00:07:28,948
- yeah, i had jill
take it for me online.
187
00:07:28,999 --> 00:07:32,752
What? what?
188
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:36,255
- [sighs]
- it's like traffic school.
189
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:41,210
- uh, david curran wants to know
190
00:07:41,244 --> 00:07:42,795
Why you gave him a "c".
191
00:07:42,846 --> 00:07:44,213
- okay, i'll bite.
192
00:07:44,247 --> 00:07:45,932
Why'd i give him a "c"?
193
00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:47,767
- you know, as your t.a.,
194
00:07:47,801 --> 00:07:49,719
I'm happy to read
the students' material
195
00:07:49,753 --> 00:07:51,137
And suggest a grade,
196
00:07:51,188 --> 00:07:54,273
But, you know, you're supposed
to read it also.
197
00:07:54,308 --> 00:07:57,092
- what do you think of jackie?
198
00:07:57,110 --> 00:07:58,527
- you think she's hot,
don't you?
199
00:07:58,562 --> 00:08:00,062
- i haven't thought about it.
200
00:08:00,096 --> 00:08:01,764
But now that i have,
yeah, she's smoking.
201
00:08:01,782 --> 00:08:03,616
- you're old enough
to be her father.
202
00:08:03,650 --> 00:08:06,202
- well, sure, i could be,
but i'm not.
203
00:08:06,236 --> 00:08:08,270
And i have no interest
in making sweet love to her
204
00:08:08,288 --> 00:08:10,456
Aside from the general interest
that all men have
205
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:11,940
In making sweet love
to all women.
206
00:08:11,959 --> 00:08:14,126
- you know, i don't think
you can be your t.a. anymore.
207
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:15,544
- i understand.
- you do?
208
00:08:15,579 --> 00:08:17,630
- you find me irresistible.
209
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:19,966
- [chuckles]
that's close.
210
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:21,450
I find you irritating.
211
00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:22,885
- careful.
that's how it starts.
212
00:08:22,919 --> 00:08:24,220
The mother
of my problem child
213
00:08:24,254 --> 00:08:25,588
Would say
the exact same thing.
214
00:08:25,622 --> 00:08:27,122
Seriously. watch it.
215
00:08:27,140 --> 00:08:28,891
- has a woman ever
punched you in the face?
216
00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:31,143
- you know what?
you should use me.
217
00:08:31,178 --> 00:08:32,144
- really?
- mm-hmm.
218
00:08:32,179 --> 00:08:33,346
- mm-hmm.
i should use you.
219
00:08:33,397 --> 00:08:35,130
I'm--i'm frightened.
220
00:08:35,148 --> 00:08:37,683
- as consultant in your search
for worthy companionship.
221
00:08:37,734 --> 00:08:40,135
- i, hank moody,
and a prime example
222
00:08:40,153 --> 00:08:41,821
Of how the male noggin works.
223
00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,972
You know, say you're out
on a date with some dick,
224
00:08:43,991 --> 00:08:45,691
He does something
you can't quite decipher,
225
00:08:45,742 --> 00:08:46,942
You call me up,
226
00:08:46,976 --> 00:08:49,578
I'll tell you what it meant.
227
00:08:49,613 --> 00:08:52,415
- thanks, dick.
that's a great idea.
228
00:08:52,449 --> 00:08:54,083
I'm gonna think about it
while i'm peeing.
229
00:08:54,117 --> 00:08:55,868
- tinkle, tinkle.
230
00:08:55,919 --> 00:08:57,086
[knock at door]
231
00:08:57,120 --> 00:08:58,621
- professor moody,
232
00:08:58,655 --> 00:08:59,955
Uh, can i have a word?
233
00:08:59,989 --> 00:09:01,507
- i suppose so,
but i was thinking
234
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,992
Of ducking out
and catching a movie.
235
00:09:04,011 --> 00:09:05,428
But i guess not.
236
00:09:05,462 --> 00:09:07,013
Office hours and whatnot.
237
00:09:07,047 --> 00:09:08,597
Come in. have a seat.
238
00:09:08,632 --> 00:09:11,333
Call me hank.
239
00:09:11,351 --> 00:09:12,334
- thank you, hank.
240
00:09:12,352 --> 00:09:13,469
- i changed my mind.
241
00:09:13,503 --> 00:09:15,771
Call me professor moody.
242
00:09:15,806 --> 00:09:17,223
I'm just fucking with you.
243
00:09:17,274 --> 00:09:20,693
Not really.
244
00:09:20,727 --> 00:09:22,228
What do you want?
245
00:09:22,279 --> 00:09:24,030
- look, i need to know...
246
00:09:24,064 --> 00:09:25,064
If i'm a writer.
247
00:09:25,115 --> 00:09:26,065
- mm.
248
00:09:26,116 --> 00:09:27,650
Jesus christ, kid.
249
00:09:27,684 --> 00:09:28,684
Who am i to tell you that?
250
00:09:28,702 --> 00:09:30,069
- well, you're my teacher.
251
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,154
I respect you, and i think
you're an awesome writer.
252
00:09:32,188 --> 00:09:33,706
- thank you.
- i've read all your books.
253
00:09:33,740 --> 00:09:35,157
Cover to cover.
254
00:09:35,191 --> 00:09:36,909
I love your picture
on the back, by the way.
255
00:09:36,960 --> 00:09:38,044
It's very handsome.
256
00:09:38,078 --> 00:09:39,745
- thank...you.
257
00:09:39,796 --> 00:09:43,549
- you're the mentor, you know?
in my story?
258
00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:48,537
The young vampire
has a crush on the old one.
259
00:09:48,555 --> 00:09:50,756
It's you. it's a metaphor.
260
00:09:50,807 --> 00:09:53,392
- i'm the old vampire.
fantastic.
261
00:09:53,427 --> 00:09:56,979
- come on, hank--
professor moody.
262
00:09:57,013 --> 00:09:59,214
Brutal truth.
263
00:09:59,232 --> 00:10:01,434
I can take it.
264
00:10:01,485 --> 00:10:03,102
- brutal truth, huh?
265
00:10:03,153 --> 00:10:05,604
- mm-hmm. absolutely.
266
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:10,526
- your story was bad.
267
00:10:10,560 --> 00:10:11,994
It was terrible, in fact.
268
00:10:12,028 --> 00:10:14,997
it was like that lame
twilight bullshit.
269
00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:16,582
I have no patience
for that crap.
270
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:18,501
It's not writing.
it's like bound toilet paper.
271
00:10:18,535 --> 00:10:20,252
Now i'm not saying
you won't get better
272
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,754
If you keep writing,
because you will.
273
00:10:21,788 --> 00:10:23,089
No question.
274
00:10:23,123 --> 00:10:25,240
But i am saying
that if you can do anything else
275
00:10:25,258 --> 00:10:26,258
With your life right now,
276
00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:28,043
Anything at all,
277
00:10:28,077 --> 00:10:29,962
I think maybe
you should do that.
278
00:10:30,013 --> 00:10:32,715
'cause the world doesn't need
anymore lame vampire fiction.
279
00:10:32,749 --> 00:10:35,751
You know what i'm saying?
280
00:10:35,769 --> 00:10:38,053
You with me, amigo?
281
00:10:38,087 --> 00:10:39,939
- i think so.
282
00:10:39,973 --> 00:10:42,108
- brutal truth, right?
283
00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:44,977
- uh, right.
284
00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:52,601
- teaching's not so hard.
285
00:10:52,619 --> 00:10:56,906
I feel bad.
he was clearly crushing on me.
286
00:10:56,940 --> 00:10:58,440
Maybe i led him on.
287
00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:00,075
- hmm? how so?
288
00:11:00,109 --> 00:11:02,411
- i don't know.
maybe i was sending out signals.
289
00:11:02,445 --> 00:11:03,746
Fuck. maybe i'm gay.
290
00:11:03,780 --> 00:11:05,214
- hank, please.
291
00:11:05,248 --> 00:11:06,465
We're all gay.
292
00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:07,616
- what the? what the?
293
00:11:07,634 --> 00:11:08,918
- i'm serious.
294
00:11:08,952 --> 00:11:10,136
- yeah, i know,
and it scares me.
295
00:11:10,170 --> 00:11:11,670
- all right,
let me put it this way.
296
00:11:11,721 --> 00:11:13,923
If you and i were trapped
together on a desert island--
297
00:11:13,957 --> 00:11:15,841
- i don't like
where this is going already.
298
00:11:15,892 --> 00:11:17,143
- it would only be
a matter of time
299
00:11:17,177 --> 00:11:18,727
Before i was putting it
in your pooper.
300
00:11:18,762 --> 00:11:19,929
- hey, i may be easy,
301
00:11:19,963 --> 00:11:21,129
But i am not sleazy.
302
00:11:21,148 --> 00:11:23,065
Besides, i don't really
see myself as a bottom.
303
00:11:23,099 --> 00:11:24,633
- fine.
you put it in my pooper.
304
00:11:24,651 --> 00:11:26,819
- my fist, maybe.
305
00:11:26,853 --> 00:11:28,571
- whatever floats your boat.
306
00:11:28,605 --> 00:11:31,407
My point being,
we're just animals.
307
00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:32,408
- perhaps, but this animal
308
00:11:32,442 --> 00:11:33,859
Prefers the warm,
cozy confines
309
00:11:33,910 --> 00:11:35,077
Of the female vagina.
310
00:11:35,111 --> 00:11:37,145
- but faced with a severe
vaginal drought,
311
00:11:37,164 --> 00:11:38,364
Men will be men.
312
00:11:38,415 --> 00:11:39,865
Boys will do boys.
313
00:11:39,916 --> 00:11:42,668
- you've given this a fair
amount of thought, haven't you?
314
00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:44,954
- it's like when
you were a kid, okay?
315
00:11:44,988 --> 00:11:46,005
You know what i'm saying?
316
00:11:46,039 --> 00:11:47,706
- no, i do not.
317
00:11:47,757 --> 00:11:50,876
- we've all got a gay experience
or two in our back pockets.
318
00:11:50,927 --> 00:11:52,044
- oh, okay. all right.
319
00:11:52,095 --> 00:11:53,462
Now--now i see
where you're going.
320
00:11:53,496 --> 00:11:55,431
Okay. what's yours?
321
00:11:55,465 --> 00:11:57,383
- oh, oh, no, no, no.
you first.
322
00:11:57,434 --> 00:11:59,635
- no way.
bald before beauty.
323
00:11:59,669 --> 00:12:01,437
- all right.
you know? fine. okay.
324
00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:03,055
So when i was growing up,
325
00:12:03,106 --> 00:12:04,557
My best friend
was mike metz.
326
00:12:04,608 --> 00:12:05,641
- uh-huh. mike metz.
327
00:12:05,675 --> 00:12:08,677
- okay, sometimes
we would undress,
328
00:12:08,695 --> 00:12:10,345
We'd lay down on the bed,
329
00:12:10,363 --> 00:12:13,515
And just, you know,
touch each other's bodies.
330
00:12:13,533 --> 00:12:15,034
It wasn't gay.
- sure.
331
00:12:15,068 --> 00:12:16,368
- it wasn't even sexual.
- mm-hmm.
332
00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:18,370
- it was, you know,
very loving, act--
333
00:12:18,405 --> 00:12:20,072
It was just an expression
of our friendship.
334
00:12:20,123 --> 00:12:21,657
- mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
- that's all.
335
00:12:21,691 --> 00:12:23,242
- well, that's interesting,
because you and i are friends,
336
00:12:23,293 --> 00:12:24,460
And yet you've never asked me
337
00:12:24,494 --> 00:12:25,744
To get undressed
and touch your body.
338
00:12:25,795 --> 00:12:29,915
- so what's yours, big boy?
339
00:12:29,966 --> 00:12:32,167
You tricked me, didn't you?
340
00:12:32,201 --> 00:12:33,702
You miserable fucking bastard.
341
00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:35,370
You keep that one
close to your vest, okay?
342
00:12:35,388 --> 00:12:37,673
- of course.
of course.
343
00:12:50,687 --> 00:12:51,887
- oh, jesus.
344
00:12:51,905 --> 00:12:53,689
You're gonna rape me,
aren't you?
345
00:12:53,723 --> 00:12:55,441
- oh, you bet your sweet ass,
rich white lady.
346
00:12:55,492 --> 00:12:56,442
- i'm not rich!
347
00:12:56,493 --> 00:12:57,993
- bullshit!
you own salon.
348
00:12:58,028 --> 00:12:58,994
Don't lie to me.
349
00:12:59,029 --> 00:12:59,995
- oh, my god.
350
00:13:00,030 --> 00:13:01,447
Put that thing away.
351
00:13:01,498 --> 00:13:04,533
That big, thick,
purple thing!
352
00:13:04,567 --> 00:13:06,068
- that's right.
you better recognize.
353
00:13:06,086 --> 00:13:07,453
This here's a one-eyed,
one-horned,
354
00:13:07,504 --> 00:13:08,871
Flying, purple,
white-woman eater.
355
00:13:08,905 --> 00:13:10,072
- oh!
356
00:13:10,090 --> 00:13:11,540
- and i'm gonna split you
like wet pine.
357
00:13:11,574 --> 00:13:12,574
- oh, yeah.
358
00:13:12,592 --> 00:13:16,545
Oh, yeah.
- [grunts]
359
00:13:16,579 --> 00:13:18,430
- no means no, you know?
- charlie!
360
00:13:18,465 --> 00:13:20,716
- this the surprise
you were talking about?
361
00:13:20,750 --> 00:13:21,800
- what the fuck are you doing?
362
00:13:21,851 --> 00:13:23,269
- what does it look like
i'm doing?
363
00:13:23,303 --> 00:13:25,271
I'm saving you.
- saving me? i'm fine!
364
00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:26,605
- no, you're not fine.
365
00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:28,774
You're being raped.
366
00:13:28,808 --> 00:13:31,644
- i am not!
367
00:13:31,695 --> 00:13:35,597
- you were too.
368
00:13:35,615 --> 00:13:37,099
- we're playing a game.
369
00:13:37,117 --> 00:13:38,567
- a game?
370
00:13:38,601 --> 00:13:40,286
What kind of game?
371
00:13:40,320 --> 00:13:42,821
Some kind of sick, twisted,
plantation-days kind of thing?
372
00:13:42,872 --> 00:13:43,822
- hey.
373
00:13:43,873 --> 00:13:45,107
Watch it, motherfucker.
374
00:13:45,125 --> 00:13:47,326
- it was a fantasy, charlie.
375
00:13:47,377 --> 00:13:49,211
- a fantasy?
376
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:50,913
- a rape fantasy.
377
00:13:50,947 --> 00:13:52,798
- a rape fanta--?
378
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:53,916
That is just sick, marcy.
379
00:13:53,950 --> 00:13:55,334
- sick?
380
00:13:55,385 --> 00:13:57,119
I'm sick?
381
00:13:57,137 --> 00:14:00,122
After all the twisted,
depraved shit
382
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:02,591
I've seen you do?
383
00:14:02,625 --> 00:14:05,811
Don't you dare
judge me, motherfucker.
384
00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,513
- oh, god.
385
00:14:07,564 --> 00:14:08,797
I think i'm gonna puke.
386
00:14:08,815 --> 00:14:12,151
- good!
387
00:14:19,409 --> 00:14:21,026
- dean koons wants to see you.
388
00:14:21,077 --> 00:14:23,862
- [coughs]
hit?
389
00:14:23,913 --> 00:14:25,647
- i'm good.
390
00:14:29,085 --> 00:14:30,786
- hey, guys.
391
00:14:30,820 --> 00:14:32,004
Thank you.
392
00:14:32,038 --> 00:14:33,822
Thank you.
393
00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:35,708
- for what?
394
00:14:35,759 --> 00:14:37,042
- i heard
you wanted to see me,
395
00:14:37,093 --> 00:14:39,094
Which could only mean
you wanted to congratulate me
396
00:14:39,129 --> 00:14:40,512
For the kickass job
i've been doing,
397
00:14:40,547 --> 00:14:43,665
So i just wanted to say
you're welcome.
398
00:14:43,683 --> 00:14:45,718
It's been my pleasure.
399
00:14:45,769 --> 00:14:47,335
- this is no time
to be glib, hank.
400
00:14:47,354 --> 00:14:49,355
- how can you be sure?
401
00:14:49,389 --> 00:14:51,106
- i'll handle this, stacy.
402
00:14:51,141 --> 00:14:53,341
There's been an incident.
403
00:14:53,360 --> 00:14:54,526
- okay, well, look.
404
00:14:54,561 --> 00:14:57,179
"niggardly"
is not a racial slur.
405
00:14:57,197 --> 00:15:00,532
And in fact, one might say
that y'all have been niggardly
406
00:15:00,567 --> 00:15:03,452
when it comes to financial
compensation pour moi.
407
00:15:03,486 --> 00:15:05,070
I'm just saying.
408
00:15:05,121 --> 00:15:06,188
- are you done handling this?
409
00:15:06,206 --> 00:15:07,189
Because we are dealing
410
00:15:07,207 --> 00:15:08,356
With an idiot man-child here.
411
00:15:08,375 --> 00:15:11,627
- "oh, me love her too much.
412
00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:13,078
"me pet her too hard.
413
00:15:13,129 --> 00:15:16,081
She no wake up."
414
00:15:16,132 --> 00:15:20,419
[groaning]
415
00:15:20,470 --> 00:15:23,756
- a student of yours tried
to commit suicide last night.
416
00:15:26,375 --> 00:15:29,762
- shitness. wow. who?
417
00:15:29,813 --> 00:15:30,896
- chris smith.
418
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,598
- chris smith?
419
00:15:32,649 --> 00:15:34,183
Chris smith.
420
00:15:34,217 --> 00:15:36,568
Ah, he's not one of mine.
thank god.
421
00:15:36,603 --> 00:15:38,153
- no, his friends
call him balt.
422
00:15:38,188 --> 00:15:41,440
- balt?
fuck, i know that dude.
423
00:15:41,491 --> 00:15:43,609
- did he seem
despondent at all?
424
00:15:43,660 --> 00:15:45,160
- more importantly,
his roommate said
425
00:15:45,195 --> 00:15:46,912
He had just returned
from a meeting with you.
426
00:15:46,946 --> 00:15:49,998
- he did stop by...
my office-es.
427
00:15:50,033 --> 00:15:52,618
- well, what was discussed?
428
00:15:52,669 --> 00:15:56,839
- life...love...
vampires and shit.
429
00:15:56,873 --> 00:15:58,240
- we're not
attacking you, hank.
430
00:15:58,258 --> 00:15:59,591
We're just trying to work out
what happened.
431
00:15:59,626 --> 00:16:00,959
- feels like you're attacking.
432
00:16:01,010 --> 00:16:02,261
- it's pretty clear
what happened.
433
00:16:02,295 --> 00:16:03,745
- stop being
so condescending, stacy.
434
00:16:03,763 --> 00:16:04,746
- look, why don't you just
435
00:16:04,764 --> 00:16:06,298
Tender your resignation
right now.
436
00:16:06,349 --> 00:16:08,767
Spare us the trouble
of an investigation.
437
00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:10,185
- you want to handle this,
stacy?
438
00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:11,687
Fine. go right ahead.
439
00:16:11,721 --> 00:16:14,422
Just leave me out of it.
440
00:16:16,776 --> 00:16:20,028
- someone's sleeping
on the couch tonight.
441
00:16:20,063 --> 00:16:21,530
Good jelly beans.
442
00:16:21,564 --> 00:16:23,782
- look, hank,
443
00:16:23,817 --> 00:16:25,951
I know you're not exactly
444
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:29,154
What anyone would call
an education professional.
445
00:16:29,205 --> 00:16:31,707
Or a professional of any kind,
for that matter.
446
00:16:31,741 --> 00:16:35,127
But my wife went out
on a limb for you.
447
00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:36,295
She loves becca.
448
00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,046
She thought it would be nice
if her father
449
00:16:38,081 --> 00:16:39,298
Was gainfully employed.
450
00:16:39,332 --> 00:16:41,500
- [imitates popeye]
ah gah gah gah gah gah!
451
00:16:41,551 --> 00:16:43,836
- that being said--
- gah gah gah!
452
00:16:43,887 --> 00:16:46,621
- that's an antique.
453
00:16:46,639 --> 00:16:49,424
If i find out
that you said or did anything
454
00:16:49,458 --> 00:16:50,926
To push that poor kid
over the edge,
455
00:16:50,960 --> 00:16:52,227
I'm gonna make it my life's work
456
00:16:52,262 --> 00:16:53,461
To make sure
you never step foot
457
00:16:53,480 --> 00:16:54,462
On this campus again.
458
00:16:54,481 --> 00:16:56,732
Do you understand me?
459
00:16:56,766 --> 00:16:59,351
Do i have your ear, hank?
460
00:16:59,402 --> 00:17:01,636
- you have
beautiful, blue eyes.
461
00:17:06,693 --> 00:17:07,860
- are you high?
462
00:17:07,911 --> 00:17:12,147
- i gotta run.
talk to you later.
463
00:17:12,165 --> 00:17:14,316
- [sighs]
464
00:17:14,334 --> 00:17:18,253
- all work and no ass-play
makes chuck a dull boy.
465
00:17:18,288 --> 00:17:20,655
- just trying
to earn my keep, sue.
466
00:17:20,673 --> 00:17:23,825
- what do you say the two of us
knock off early, huh?
467
00:17:23,843 --> 00:17:25,511
Slip out of this
business casual,
468
00:17:25,545 --> 00:17:26,962
Nude-up in my "jacooze",
469
00:17:26,996 --> 00:17:29,214
See what kind of sodomy laws
we can break?
470
00:17:29,265 --> 00:17:32,518
- sounds like the height
of decadence, sue.
471
00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:34,836
But i should probably
get through this slush pile.
472
00:17:34,854 --> 00:17:36,889
Who knows? i might even
find something good.
473
00:17:36,940 --> 00:17:38,340
- who knows?
474
00:17:38,358 --> 00:17:39,691
You might find something better
475
00:17:39,726 --> 00:17:41,059
In my punani.
476
00:17:41,110 --> 00:17:42,611
- yeah.
477
00:17:42,645 --> 00:17:45,180
Warren beatty's
lost rolex, maybe.
478
00:17:45,198 --> 00:17:46,949
- [laughs]
479
00:17:46,983 --> 00:17:50,352
Oh, you are a dirty dog.
480
00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:51,870
I like your style, runkle.
481
00:17:51,905 --> 00:17:56,691
- hey, can i ask you
a question, sue?
482
00:17:56,709 --> 00:17:58,193
- the answer's yes.
483
00:17:58,211 --> 00:17:59,878
I would love a face-ride.
484
00:17:59,913 --> 00:18:02,364
- seriously,
485
00:18:02,382 --> 00:18:06,301
Do women ever fantasize
486
00:18:06,336 --> 00:18:09,254
About...being raped?
487
00:18:09,305 --> 00:18:12,207
- are you trying to get me wet?
488
00:18:12,225 --> 00:18:15,143
- i don't think so.
- yes, charlie.
489
00:18:15,178 --> 00:18:18,063
Women fantasize about rape.
490
00:18:18,097 --> 00:18:19,398
- really?
- mm-hmm.
491
00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:25,220
And my own features
a handsome stranger.
492
00:18:25,238 --> 00:18:30,659
think jack, circa
the postman always rings twice,
493
00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:34,396
Sneaking into my bedroom
and taking me in my sleep.
494
00:18:34,414 --> 00:18:36,531
He pulls down my panties.
495
00:18:36,565 --> 00:18:38,784
He enters slowly.
496
00:18:38,835 --> 00:18:40,902
Slips right in.
497
00:18:40,920 --> 00:18:43,622
Oh, jack.
the pussy never lies.
498
00:18:43,673 --> 00:18:44,790
Remember that, runkle.
499
00:18:44,841 --> 00:18:47,075
I kick, i scream,
but it's too late.
500
00:18:47,093 --> 00:18:49,011
I mean,
the juices are flowing.
501
00:18:49,045 --> 00:18:50,596
The train
has left the station.
502
00:18:50,630 --> 00:18:54,633
We are headed for a big,
fat, rocky orgasm.
503
00:18:54,684 --> 00:18:57,752
Oh, sweet jesus, guide me.
504
00:19:04,227 --> 00:19:05,978
Are you trying to tell me
something, runkle?
505
00:19:06,029 --> 00:19:09,597
Are you thinking
about some role playing?
506
00:19:09,616 --> 00:19:11,533
Because you name the game,
507
00:19:11,567 --> 00:19:12,767
I'll play the part.
508
00:19:12,785 --> 00:19:14,486
And i'm good at it.
509
00:19:14,537 --> 00:19:17,239
I used to run lines
with margot kidder.
510
00:19:17,273 --> 00:19:19,658
Before she went apeshit.
511
00:19:19,709 --> 00:19:21,326
Try me sometime.
512
00:19:29,168 --> 00:19:31,169
- [clears throat]
513
00:19:31,220 --> 00:19:32,838
- wow. look who's here.
514
00:19:32,889 --> 00:19:34,289
What's up, asshole?
515
00:19:34,307 --> 00:19:36,308
- that's no way to address
your teacher, young lady.
516
00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,477
- is that what you are?
a teacher?
517
00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:41,346
I was thinking more like
a destroyer of hopes and dreams.
518
00:19:41,397 --> 00:19:42,514
- is he gonna be okay?
519
00:19:42,565 --> 00:19:43,649
- maybe if you put
520
00:19:43,683 --> 00:19:45,767
Your fuckin' cigarette out.
521
00:19:45,801 --> 00:19:47,019
He's fine.
522
00:19:47,070 --> 00:19:48,270
He got depressed
523
00:19:48,304 --> 00:19:50,138
And he drank all the cold
medicine he could find.
524
00:19:50,156 --> 00:19:52,524
He's such a fuckin' queen.
525
00:19:57,030 --> 00:19:58,030
- you came.
526
00:19:58,081 --> 00:19:59,831
- 'course i did, buddy.
527
00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:01,583
How you doing?
528
00:20:01,617 --> 00:20:03,418
- i hate myself,
and i want to fucking die.
529
00:20:03,453 --> 00:20:05,537
- oh, been there.
530
00:20:05,588 --> 00:20:06,538
- i doubt it.
531
00:20:06,589 --> 00:20:07,655
What could you possibly know
532
00:20:07,674 --> 00:20:08,990
About being
a fucked-up gay kid?
533
00:20:09,008 --> 00:20:11,710
- we're all...gay.
534
00:20:11,761 --> 00:20:14,829
In--in some form or another.
535
00:20:14,847 --> 00:20:19,685
We've all had a gay experience
in our past or two.
536
00:20:19,719 --> 00:20:20,852
- you too?
537
00:20:20,887 --> 00:20:21,887
- oh, hells yeah.
538
00:20:21,938 --> 00:20:24,056
- tell me about it.
539
00:20:27,610 --> 00:20:31,113
- well, when i was a--
when i was a kid,
540
00:20:31,147 --> 00:20:34,349
Barely a teenager,
541
00:20:34,367 --> 00:20:37,119
My best friend and i,
mike metz,
542
00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:41,540
Yeah, we would, uh,
we'd get undressed....
543
00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:45,494
- d-don't stop.
544
00:20:45,528 --> 00:20:49,498
- right.
and, um, you know,
545
00:20:49,532 --> 00:20:52,584
We would--we would
lay in bed together...
546
00:20:52,635 --> 00:20:54,503
Naked, um,
547
00:20:54,537 --> 00:20:57,889
Touching each other's...
548
00:20:57,924 --> 00:20:59,758
Naked bodies.
549
00:20:59,809 --> 00:21:01,977
You know, just--
and--and it wasn't, like,
550
00:21:02,011 --> 00:21:04,546
Uh, sexual or gay,
551
00:21:04,564 --> 00:21:06,732
But just more of a...
552
00:21:06,766 --> 00:21:11,686
More of an expression
of our profound friendship.
553
00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:14,072
- see, i don't know.
554
00:21:14,107 --> 00:21:16,908
It sounds
pretty fucking gay to me.
555
00:21:16,943 --> 00:21:20,779
- it does sound gay.
556
00:21:20,830 --> 00:21:22,397
You know what?
557
00:21:22,415 --> 00:21:24,232
I'm sorry if i bummed you out.
558
00:21:24,250 --> 00:21:26,868
But you got to cut me
some slack here.
559
00:21:26,902 --> 00:21:28,420
I'm pretty new
to this teaching thing.
560
00:21:28,454 --> 00:21:31,072
I don't know
what the fuck i'm doing.
561
00:21:31,090 --> 00:21:33,741
You know what i dug
about your story?
562
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:35,127
There was one line i loved.
563
00:21:35,178 --> 00:21:37,796
Um, "the twilight
of his eternal youth."
564
00:21:37,847 --> 00:21:40,582
Really dug that.
stuck in my head.
565
00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:42,968
- i polished that one
for a while, actually.
566
00:21:43,019 --> 00:21:45,470
- mm. polish it.
567
00:21:45,521 --> 00:21:48,140
- well, shit.
i gotta get to work.
568
00:21:48,191 --> 00:21:50,091
You think you could
stay with him for a little bit?
569
00:21:50,109 --> 00:21:53,061
- oh, no, i have, uh--
570
00:21:53,095 --> 00:21:55,763
I got to--
i got to run too, so...
571
00:21:58,201 --> 00:22:00,268
Yeah, i can.
572
00:22:00,286 --> 00:22:02,204
- no. you know what
you can do for me?
573
00:22:02,238 --> 00:22:03,622
- what?
574
00:22:03,656 --> 00:22:05,791
- give her a ride.
575
00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:07,542
She took the bus
all the way here.
576
00:22:07,577 --> 00:22:09,377
God knows
she's too hot for that.
577
00:22:09,412 --> 00:22:11,663
I wouldn't want her
getting raped on my account.
578
00:22:11,714 --> 00:22:13,948
- that would be
most unfortunate.
579
00:22:13,966 --> 00:22:16,918
- come with me.
my rape-proof chariot awaits.
580
00:22:16,952 --> 00:22:17,919
Later, pale skin.
581
00:22:17,953 --> 00:22:18,920
I hope you feel better.
582
00:22:18,954 --> 00:22:20,955
Keep scribbling.
583
00:22:20,973 --> 00:22:23,558
- no kiss goodnight?
- oh.
584
00:22:26,395 --> 00:22:29,014
- bye, honey.
585
00:22:46,115 --> 00:22:49,084
[sensuous music]
586
00:22:49,118 --> 00:22:57,125
? ?
587
00:23:38,501 --> 00:23:41,086
- huh?! charlie!
588
00:23:41,137 --> 00:23:42,870
What the fuck are you doing?
589
00:23:42,889 --> 00:23:44,205
- what does it look like
i'm doing?
590
00:23:44,223 --> 00:23:45,223
I'm raping you.
591
00:23:45,258 --> 00:23:47,592
- get off me,
you fucking asshole!
592
00:23:47,643 --> 00:23:48,593
- do you love it?
593
00:23:48,644 --> 00:23:50,729
- no! stop it now!
594
00:23:50,763 --> 00:23:51,730
- because i love it.
595
00:23:51,764 --> 00:23:53,598
This is so not consensual.
596
00:23:53,649 --> 00:23:56,935
[punch]
- oh! ow! ow.
597
00:23:56,986 --> 00:23:59,271
Ow. ow.
598
00:23:59,322 --> 00:24:02,056
Ow.
599
00:24:02,074 --> 00:24:04,109
Fuck.
600
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:06,060
- what are you thinking?
601
00:24:06,078 --> 00:24:08,580
- guess i thought it was
something you might enjoy.
602
00:24:08,614 --> 00:24:10,615
You know, and maybe
in the middle you'd be like,
603
00:24:10,666 --> 00:24:12,751
"god, i really do love
this schmuck."
604
00:24:12,785 --> 00:24:15,003
- you thought that
in the middle of raping me
605
00:24:15,037 --> 00:24:16,738
I'd realize how much
i love you?!
606
00:24:16,756 --> 00:24:18,840
- something like that.
607
00:24:18,874 --> 00:24:22,844
Yeah. but it sounded
a lot better the way i said it.
608
00:24:22,878 --> 00:24:24,879
And, just to be fair,
you know,
609
00:24:24,913 --> 00:24:26,598
it was a rape fantasy.
610
00:24:26,632 --> 00:24:28,300
- for you, maybe.
611
00:24:28,351 --> 00:24:30,352
- okay.
612
00:24:30,386 --> 00:24:33,388
Well, i'm sorry
for the misunderstanding.
613
00:24:33,422 --> 00:24:34,389
My bad.
614
00:24:38,527 --> 00:24:41,947
Sorry. these are yours.
615
00:24:41,981 --> 00:24:44,482
[sighs]
616
00:24:44,533 --> 00:24:47,485
[rock music]
617
00:24:47,536 --> 00:24:55,043
? ?
618
00:24:55,077 --> 00:24:56,277
- this is where you work?
619
00:24:56,295 --> 00:24:57,379
- yup.
620
00:24:57,413 --> 00:24:59,080
- but you just work
the front desk
621
00:24:59,114 --> 00:25:01,132
Or you're the cashier
or something like that, right?
622
00:25:01,167 --> 00:25:03,117
- something like that.
623
00:25:03,135 --> 00:25:04,469
- interesting.
624
00:25:04,503 --> 00:25:06,120
- you want to come inside?
625
00:25:06,138 --> 00:25:07,455
Maybe wet your whistle?
626
00:25:07,473 --> 00:25:09,841
- would that involve
seeing you naked?
627
00:25:09,892 --> 00:25:10,842
- oh, most definitely.
628
00:25:10,893 --> 00:25:12,844
- then, no offense,
but i think not.
629
00:25:12,895 --> 00:25:14,679
In the interest of
student-teacher relations.
630
00:25:14,730 --> 00:25:17,277
- wow. look at you
with the moral rectitude.
631
00:25:17,311 --> 00:25:18,278
I'm impressed.
632
00:25:18,312 --> 00:25:19,862
- i know. me too.
633
00:25:19,897 --> 00:25:20,947
- thanks for the ride, prof.
634
00:25:20,981 --> 00:25:21,948
- any time.
635
00:25:21,982 --> 00:25:23,566
Well, you know,
not--not any time.
636
00:25:23,617 --> 00:25:25,702
I don't think this is the best
habit to get into.
637
00:25:25,736 --> 00:25:26,852
- you were right, you know?
638
00:25:26,870 --> 00:25:28,538
He's a shitty writer.
639
00:25:28,572 --> 00:25:30,356
Someone had to tell him.
640
00:25:30,374 --> 00:25:32,125
You know,
parents tell their kids
641
00:25:32,159 --> 00:25:34,294
They can be anything
they want when they grow up.
642
00:25:34,328 --> 00:25:35,295
But it's not true.
643
00:25:35,329 --> 00:25:36,746
Not for everyone.
644
00:25:36,797 --> 00:25:38,498
Sometimes that can fuck you up
645
00:25:38,532 --> 00:25:39,882
A lot more than
someone telling you
646
00:25:39,917 --> 00:25:42,302
You can't do a goddamn thing.
647
00:25:42,336 --> 00:25:46,038
Besides, you can't really
teach writing, can you?
648
00:25:46,056 --> 00:25:47,707
- you're a smart kid.
you know that?
649
00:25:47,725 --> 00:25:49,976
- damn straight.
650
00:25:50,010 --> 00:25:52,895
All right, i got to go shake
my money-makers.
651
00:25:52,930 --> 00:25:54,547
- okay.
- have a good night.
652
00:25:54,565 --> 00:25:56,099
- you have a good night too.
653
00:25:56,150 --> 00:25:59,552
I hope you get, uh,
lots of singles...i guess.
654
00:25:59,570 --> 00:26:02,155
Or fives, or...
- all right.
655
00:26:02,189 --> 00:26:03,156
- benjamins? i don't know.
656
00:26:03,190 --> 00:26:04,774
- bye.
- bye.
657
00:26:14,752 --> 00:26:16,252
Hey, where are you going,
short stuff?
658
00:26:16,286 --> 00:26:18,838
- out.
- out, you say?
659
00:26:18,872 --> 00:26:19,839
Out where?
660
00:26:19,873 --> 00:26:20,840
- just out.
661
00:26:20,874 --> 00:26:22,125
- just out?
662
00:26:22,176 --> 00:26:23,576
I'm not familiar
with that area.
663
00:26:23,594 --> 00:26:25,578
- the promenade.
i'm meeting chelsea.
664
00:26:25,596 --> 00:26:28,931
- oh, not so fast.
how you gonna get there?
665
00:26:28,966 --> 00:26:31,851
- i don't know.
i'll walk or take the bus.
666
00:26:31,885 --> 00:26:32,918
- did you even think to ask?
667
00:26:32,936 --> 00:26:35,054
- i didn't think you'd care.
668
00:26:35,088 --> 00:26:37,357
- well, sorry, honey.
looks like i do.
669
00:26:37,391 --> 00:26:38,358
- okay, good to know.
670
00:26:38,392 --> 00:26:40,443
So can i go?
- no.
671
00:26:40,477 --> 00:26:42,094
Why don't you stay in
with me tonight?
672
00:26:42,112 --> 00:26:44,147
You know, we'll--
we'll watch a movie.
673
00:26:44,198 --> 00:26:45,531
Pop some corn.
674
00:26:45,566 --> 00:26:47,099
The promenade
will always be there.
675
00:26:47,117 --> 00:26:48,568
Unfortunately.
676
00:26:48,602 --> 00:26:49,952
- yeah,
sounds like a good time,
677
00:26:49,987 --> 00:26:51,654
But i think i'd rather go out.
678
00:26:51,705 --> 00:26:53,790
- well, i--i think i'd rather
have you stay home.
679
00:26:53,824 --> 00:26:54,907
How 'bout that?
680
00:26:54,941 --> 00:26:57,660
- got it. loud and clear.
so can i go?
681
00:26:57,711 --> 00:27:00,380
- asked and answered, becca.
- why?
682
00:27:00,414 --> 00:27:03,249
- because i said so.
- because you said so?
683
00:27:03,283 --> 00:27:06,452
- because i said so.
- jesus.
684
00:27:06,470 --> 00:27:08,921
- who are you texting?
- chelsea.
685
00:27:08,955 --> 00:27:10,757
To tell her you're being
a total dick right now.
686
00:27:10,791 --> 00:27:12,341
- what is going on with you?
687
00:27:12,393 --> 00:27:14,761
When did you become
such a little snot?
688
00:27:14,795 --> 00:27:16,095
That is not funny, becca.
689
00:27:16,129 --> 00:27:18,898
- it's funny to me.
690
00:27:23,487 --> 00:27:24,604
[glass shatters]
691
00:27:24,638 --> 00:27:26,355
- i fucking hate you!
692
00:27:26,407 --> 00:27:28,024
- yeah,
and i fuckin' hate you too,
693
00:27:28,075 --> 00:27:30,976
You little shit.
694
00:27:30,994 --> 00:27:33,529
[door slams]
695
00:27:33,580 --> 00:27:36,662
Sync by honeybunny
www.addic7ed.com